


How to deal with a Frank Iero who isn't himself

by BashfullyGay



Series: My Chem fics [2]
Category: My Chemical Romance, My Chemical Romance - van days, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge - My Chemical Romance (Album)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Ass Play, Bob is just here due to the era, Cuddling & Snuggling, Depression, Diary/Journal, Dissociation, Everyone Is Gay, Gay, M/M, Multi, Other, Panic Attacks, Pre-Poly, References to Depression, Revenge Era Frank Iero, Revenge Era Gerard Way, Revenge Era Mikey Way, Revenge Era Ray Toro, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge Era, Touring, Van Days, gay vibes, horny boys, needy my chem, revenge era bob bryar, still hate the fucker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:48:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27344572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BashfullyGay/pseuds/BashfullyGay
Summary: No matter how hard Frank tries to hide what is happening his bandmates still notice his wet hoodie sleeves, red dead eyes and snuff nose. They notice how he isn't as active on stage on how he is reserving himself more and more, they secretly take matters into their own hands to make sure he gets back to his old self.They do it in a unconventional way though.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Everyone, Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Frank Iero/Mikey Way, Frank Iero/Ray Toro, Frank Iero/Ray Toro/Gerard Way/Mikey Way
Series: My Chem fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746259
Comments: 5
Kudos: 32





	1. Frankie Dissociates and No One Noticies

Things suck. But very good. Being out on the road with all of the openness of the world. Which was mainly just grain fields, depressing little gas stations and even more depressing little towns until they hit the bright cities they play in.  
Neon lights and neon eyes. Bright smeared makeup and sweat from the excitement. It's beautiful and extremely addictive. But so draining, the aftermath of laying in the van. Sweating, panting and collapsing. The adrenaline slipping out of their bodies.  
Ray, thankfully, being the homeboy he is, usually after shows drives them to the next gas station and switches out. Or drives them to their crappy as fuck motels. Making sure they got the sleep, knowing truly that none of them other than him or Bob could drive after shows. They had done that during bullets and it did not work out. They tried all of the other boys Mikey and Gerard fell asleep, and well himself, well, he was just too bouncy or two slow with his correction time when driving.  
Ray didn’t mind too much since that meant he got first choice on bed. Frank also didn’t mind too much. There had been a couple times if the motel didn’t give them a second bed he would just cuddle up to him like a little backpack and just sleep. It just meant he was teased by the others a little but he didn’t care. The man had a little umph to him and he kept him warm during the colder nights.  
Well, it was after a show again. He was in the middle aisle. Crushed between boxes, merch and instruments. At least he was at the door so he could escape to the bathroom quickly before his bladder burst. Now he is just sitting here, staring too deeply into the floor, at the trash and cans on the floor.  
He could feel the shadows licking at his skin. Sinking in and making him slip away farther and farther from his body. Hovering above it while he watches his own hands shake in his lap. The sounds of the music from the radio making his whimpers and sniffles disappear into the song. Nothing heard by the others.  
No matter from what position he is in when this happens he knows what's happening, and like all other times. He’s crying and trying hard not to pull out his hair and scream into the nothingness. But unfortunately his band mates would worry and ask him too many questions he is not comfortable with yet. So he stays silent. Not that he can make much noise since he isn’t in his body at all.  
He can see his own face from his vantage point. His eyes are leaking small tears, mouth pressed into a thin line, face pale and his eyes gone and dead. He wishes he felt better, that he could comfort his own body. Hug himself and whip away his itchy tears. Make himself feel okay. But he can’t.

He is aggressively thrown back into his body as Mikey kicks his seat. Startled, he wipes away his tears and looks around.  
“Ray! Pull the fuck over! We need to fucking piss back here!” Mikey says sharply over the radio. Ray just nods in the rearview mirror and looks at the side signs until he finds a rest stop.  
Frank readjusts himself from his seating, popping his neck. Bouncing his leg until they stop, now noticing his pressing and pissed off bladder. His hands are shaking less now thankfully but Mr. Fucking Way yelling made him a little scared. He rarely raises his voice under just a normal speaking tone, but after shows they all deal with lessened hearing due to the cramped venues.  
They soon pull over to the rest stop, bathroom, a closed coffee shop, some half filled vending machines and an open shop. He didn’t know what they selled tho. Grabbing his wallet as Ray parks. Slamming open the van door and popping the middle row chair for Mikey and Gerard he walks quickly to the toilets.  
The cold early morning air hits his body and makes him feel already smaller than he is. Walking quicker to the run down reddish brown rest stop toilets, he slips into then and goes to a stall.  
After doing his business and cursing himself as he once again nicks his skeleton gloves on his zipper. Gets himself all ready, flushes and exits the stall. Taking off said gloves as he goes to the small area to wash his hands. Gloves shoved in his pocket and sleeves rolled up he started washing his hands thoroughly. Gerard is seen in the mirror by his black skinny jeans and oversized shirt and hoodie. Crams next to him to wash his hands at the other sink. The area is so small, while he goes to touch Frank’s back to tell him he’s here and not frighten him. Brushes against his ass. A small inhale comes from his body. Cursing himself in his head Gerard gives him a confused noise.  
“You okay Franky?” The taller states  
“Yeah, water just went cold on me” He states, too wrapped up in his mind to notice the slightly steaming warm water that was actually hitting his hands.  
He turns around after finishing washing his hands to find the paper towel dispenser. Gerard’s hand once again brushes against his ass. A small whimper comes from him and Gee chuckles. Blushing he quickly finds the paper towel dispenser and dries off his hands hastily before he walks out into the cold air. He really fucking hoped Gerard wouldn’t say shit to the others.  
Noticing the shop again he walks over and looks at the contents. Pens, notebooks, magazines of the state and what you should see, newspapers and some sleeping and pain meds. Grabbing out his misfits wallet he grabs 5 dollars.  
To the tired looking slightly overweight front counter lady he says “may I have one of the notebooks and a pen?” Putting the cash on the counter she nods and hands them to him and takes the money.  
“Here honey, stay safe on your travels” She says as he picks up the stuff. He gives a small smile and waves. Thanking her. Walking back to the van with his stuff he sees Mikey and Bob with handfuls of more shitty food and drinks while Ray is giving a disapproving look, probably telling them they already had too much trash in the car and that they needed to, tomorrow to clean it out. Moving closer he hears Gerard’s giggles at what is folding out in front of him.  
“Once we stop at the venue, you are going to clean out the van, crawl around for all I care, you guys need to pick up after yourselves” Ray ranted.  
“Yeah soon you guys will be one less guitarist because i’ll be drowned in trash” Frank joked tiredly. His eyes are deadpanning while he has a small smirk on his face. Bob huffed while Ray was saying something and the Way’s were just cackling loudly at his comment. At least he could make the others laugh and feel happy.  
Everyone gets situated into their seats, snacks and drinks spread out to everyone. They head back onto the road. Frank opened up his notebook and started to write, not paying attention to his bandmates banter.


	2. Sleeping Bandmates and Connecting them to Ancient Roman deities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank had a shift driving change with Bob after another bathroom break. Enjoying in on some trail mix he once again, leaves his body temporarily and watches his bandmates sleep. Taking notice to the little things and complimenting them.

Frank wasn’t really one to write in a notebook or diary, but, the thing is he just really needed to write out what was happening. He felt like it was all in his head and that they weren’t happening. He decided, ‘well, lets right this shit down and see’. Writing it down was weird especially trying to get the view of before he left his body and then the 3rd person view. He also wrote down on what happened with Gerard in the bathroom.  
He has known for a while, past partners, male and female. They had played with his ass, grabbing groping and everything. He was extremely sensitive in the area. A single squeeze could make him moan and shiver. There had been times with boyfriends, they would eat him out and rim him. Holding his quite firm ass. Licking at his hole and making him shiver and whimper. The whole area was so sensitive. The thing is, it didn’t make him cum super quickly, it put him a few inches from the edge, by the end of being eaten out or fucked. He would be mindless with pleasure. When you would look into his eyes, they would be glazed over, only pleasure and love there  
Snapping himself out of his thoughts, he shifted in his seat, his cock half hard in his pants. It pressed against his thigh. A small whimper comes from him, hidden due to the radio. Looking at his notebook, he saw that he went through two pages already, and he had written down his sexual adventures. Blushing, he shuts the notebook and shoves it into his bag. Tomorrow he is going to have to rip out the last page and throw it away. Rearranging himself so his half hard cock isn’t as noticeable and he grabs the gray blanket. Putting it over his lap he lays against the door and closes his eyes. Wishing sleep to take him.

\--

Slowly waking up from his sleep. His back, neck and legs are instantly aching. Small shoots of pain buzzing through his body. Rubbing sleep from his eyes he looks around. It looks around 8am, Toro asleep in the passenger seat. Bob driving the van. Shifting up himself into a better position. Stretching, he could tell that he wouldn’t be able to sleep.  
His sleep hazy voice he says “Bob? Can we stop at a restroom?” Stretching more he shifts. At least he didn’t have morning wood. Popping his neck.  
“Yeah sure, I need to take a piss anyways, glad you’re awake though.” Bob says, eyes trained on the road watching the other cars around him. “Can you also take over driving? Around two am I took over and I have a massive headache man” He grumbled it enough to be just over the soft playing radio and just enough to not wake up the curly haired man next to him.  
“Sure dude, of course” He leans up and pats the drummers shoulder.   
They soon once again start toward a near rest stop, a couple miles away. They stopped, Him and Bob went to the restroom and switched spots. The Way’s and Toros didn’t wake up at all during the small stop. Bob gave Frank a can of sprite and some M&M free trail mix that they had in the back.  
He drank his sprite and enjoyed his trail mix with ease. His mind wondering like it usually does when he drives, he thinks of shows, setlists, new songs and lyrics, his fucked up life, where the band will be in 10 years. All of that good shit. But today was different, occasionally looking at his map and seeing that they had to stay on this one stretch for a good while he bumps up the radio a bit and just slips into existence of where he is.   
His mind goes hazy and he internally screams at himself. He can feel his mind slip out of his body. After he is floating next to himself, sitting on the consul he sees that he is still driving, taking notice of everything, blinking and such. He seemed like he though his mind was away from his body so he didn’t need to worry too much. Looking at Ray beside him, he sees that he is still deep in sleep. Curl up a little in his seat with Revenge hoodie covering his upper body.  
His friends he has got to admit are very attractive, they always have been and he has always taken notice. Though he has tried to block it out the best he can. One of the things about Ray though that he finds especially beautiful are his hands and thighs. Toro’s hands compared to his were massive, the calluses on them from guitar and occasionally bass were prominent. His hands look like they were sculpted by ancient romans. They were awe worthy. And god, his thighs, when he shredded and walked around on stage you can practically see the muscle under them, they were thick and powerful. One time when he and Ray got drunk he grabbed the others thigh. It felt amazing under his hand. Kinda like touching a Bull, knowing the power and natural beauty that holds under what you can see.  
Turning his mind, ghostly form he looked towards the back of the van. Seeing Bob in his usual seat. Splayed out in sleep. Though he didn’t particularly find him attractive he did have things that he admired. One of those things was his arms. Bob wasn’t like most other drummers, they played with their wrists mainly, but Bryar played with his arms. Hidden through his shirts were powerful drumming god arms. There had been a couple times where Bryar had picked him up from being a little shit, or he was too drunk/high to keep walking. He picked him up with ease and only bitched about having to do it. He felt small and almost subby in the drummer's arms. He wished he had some of his strength.  
Getting up from the consul he floated back towards the ways. All of their weirdness were kinda cuddled up to each other. Their heads leaning against each other and Mikey was leaning more into his older brother, kinda slumped over. Their greasy hair pushed against their dirty clothes. They had poor hygiene and clothing cleaning due to many different problems. But they were both fucking hot as hell. Mikey with his jaw that could cut a bitch and his cold piercing eyes that just make him want to fall onto his knees and beg for anything, something. His hands, he knows, would be wonderful for more sensual situations. He would willingly let the younger Way have his way with him. Destroying him and putting him back together. And Gerard, God Gerard. He made Frank feel so many different ways and in such a short amount of time. They had done so much on stage, but the thing is. He wished for so much more. He didn’t know if he wanted to be romantic or sexual. But both were very appealing to him. Gerard had a lot to him and all of it was beautiful. His eyes catches yours and he would wink at you knowingly, his touch making him shiver and begging for more. The older Way’s mind was also awe worthy, his lyric and comic ideas he could listen to for hours. They were amazing and he wished that he could just sit in his mind and see what all he thought about, all of his ideas he never spoke to anyone about.  
Moving his eyes away from the sleeping brother he looks back at himself. Catching his own eyes staring at him in the rearview mirror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I really enjoyed writing this chapter, cause 1 I got to write on what I find beautiful in all of the boys (minus Frank since he is our POV) and 2 writing on what I have experienced. As a very active day dreamer with Dissociative Identity Disorder I have had moments like these, taking in the world around me while my body still is active. Frank doesn't have DID his depression (like mine) makes him occasionally lose touch with reality and just, not have to worry too much about being in his own body.
> 
> Also I hope yall like the end of the chapter, cause I sure do ;)


	3. Waffle House, Gerard is a tease and Jokes galore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank, after leaving his body, Joins back to proper reality. Deciding for a brunch and bathroom break. Gerard questions frank. Making him regret ever being so sensitive.

Blinking, he’s back in his body. His hand stutters a bit on the wheel but he corrects himself. Breathing hard and sweating softly. His hands are shaking while he grips the wheel. Looking back at the map he notices that they were about to need to move off of the highway. Checking the clock it was around ten thirty. Surprised at how much time has passed.   
“You okay Frank?” He looks over at the passenger side and Ray is awake and looking at him with a confused look. He feels himself sweating more and looks back at the road.  
“Y-yeah dude, I think I spaced for a sec” He stutters out to him. Trying not to notice the hard on he had from his ghostly form. Shifting uncomfortably.  
“Alrighty dude” Ray said, giving himself another look and then looking at the map. Humming to the nirvana song on the radio. Turning it up a bit more. Some distant groans of the Way’s.  
“We should wake up the others and get some food soon” He mentioned to the lead Guitarist next to him and he just gave a mhm. “Can you see what is around for us to stop and eat?”  
“Ooo sign just showed a waffle house logo, let's head there!” Ray said excitedly to him while he just rolled his eyes. Looks like for breakfast he is gonna have another salad.   
Sighing softly he starts the van towards the waffle house, groans of discontent by the shift change of the van. They soon find it and park in the parking lot. Turning the van off and hopping out. Going to the sliding door he throws it open.  
“Wake up princesses, its waffle house time.” He says, Bob rubs his eyes and gives a glare, they soon light up once he sees what's behind him. He unbuckles and shoves his way out of the van past Frank. Ray laughs loudly at Frank's look of disbelief. Frank opens up so the Ways can extricate themselves from the van back seats. Mikey is the first to come out. Glasses skewed, eyes with sleep ickies in them and his clothes messed up. He gives the younger way a look and he just glares. “Did I wake you up sleeping beauty?~” Frank snickered.  
Mikey grumbles a ‘fuck off’ to him and Gerard smirks at him as he moves out. Ray and Mikey walk to the waffle house together. Looking to Gerard he smiles.

“Now that we are alone now, you gonna tell me what yesterday was?~” His tone is nearly seductive. Frank has to stop himself from leaning into his body.  
“What do you mean Gee?” He said, playing dumb.  
“You know what I mean, You made little noises when my hand brushed against your ass dude” He said simply like it wasn’t a big deal.  
“It’s nothing Gee, seriously” Frank stutters out softly. He can feel the lead singer's eyes on him. Taking everything into account and his slightly skewed pants. Gerard moves completely out of the van and stands in front of him, blocking the view of the windows of the waffle house from the others. He feels his face heat up as Gerard pins him to the van.  
“Do you like your ass being groped Frankie? Does it turn you on?~ Make you all needy and begging for more?~” Gerard smirked at him as he squirms softly and skews his eyes away from the older. Without his consent, He nods at gee. Telling him all he needs to know.  
Gerard moves away from him and walks towards the restaurant. Leaving Frank standing there, once again with a problem in his jeans and confused on everything that just happened. He went into sub space a little. Fuck.  
\--

Walking after Gerard to the waffle house correcting himself once again as he walks in. Find the band he walks over and sits down next to Mikey who whispers to him.  
“What did you do?” The deadpanned man said.  
“What do you mean?” He murmured.  
“He came in smirking like he got candy out of our mom’s secret stash” Mikey mentioned looking at the Waffle House menu. He just shrugged.  
“Nothing at all dude, just talked to me on changing a bit of setlist for our next show” Keeping his face kinda dull he looks over Mikey’s shoulder at the menu. Seeing of course there wasn’t much he could get he sighed softly.

They order coffee for everyone. Ray was getting pancakes with bacon, Mikey waffle plate and eggs, Gerard has toast eggs and bacon, Bob the monster he is with a full plate of nearly everything. Frank? Well thankfully they had some oatmeal, he got some toast and had some jam for breakfast.   
They all eat their food, talking and drinking coffee together. Huffing softly he taps his fingers on his thigh. Sipping on his coffee he notices the sign to the bathroom. Setting his cup down, he gets up and heads over.  
Once again after using the bathroom he exits back into the main dining area. Walking back to the table his bandmates look at him. As he walks around and slides in next to Mikey he says.  
“What? Did I walk out with toilet paper on my forehead?” The boys laugh at his comment and say no.  
“Nah we just heard you walking and wanted to see if you were okay, you stood up after telling no one” Bob mentioned taking a sip of his coffee.  
“Am I supposed too? ‘Hey mom gonna go take a fat shit real quick’” He joked, Gerard spit out his drink and started choking laughing. Ray just face palming at his comment.  
They continue to joke with each other being lighthearted and happy. Frank was actually feeling a little bit more like himself, a little bit. He could feel the mindlessness slowly slipping up his feet and legs. Telling him this won't last and he will once again be completely filled with darkness.   
His lips slip into a thin nearly grim line. As he stares at the table. Hoping the moment will last forever.

They head out of Waffle House and walk back to the van. Gerard picking up driving. Mikey joins him up front to keep him company, Ray and Bob take the Way’s normal seats and soon they are off.


	4. Frank gets overwhelm emotionally and later, hornily

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW// depression, panic attack, minor self harm. This chapter also has minor sexual content in it. Read at your own caution of these topics.  
> Frank gets back into the vans with the others once again. But soon he gets overwhelmed with pent up emotions and feels. They all spill out in one go. Making his bandmates worry and finally notice that Frank isn't as okay as he shows himself to be.

Frank was once again in his normal spot. Squished again the van door with an empty look in his eyes. He didn’t really know what he looked like to the others but he could practically feel the numbness dripping down his face into his lap. Sighing softly he brushes his hair out of his face and stares at his old sneakers.  
Dirt and grime covered them from long walks, running from angry parents homes and from dirty venues. There were holes showing his dirty socks and his shoe laces were nearly falling apart. He pretends like he didn’t really care but he wishes he had enough money to purchase himself some new shoes. But they weren’t making enough money for that. Sometimes they barely had two hotel rooms.  
Huffing he wipes at his eyes harshly and shivers in his seat. He wanted to change, he wanted to be someone different. Someone who actually mattered and was worth something. His hands grab his head and he shoves his face into his knees. His hearing becomes more muffled as he breathes heavily. Starting to harder he sobs into his dirty clothing. Pulling at his hair in anguish. To his right he hears some muffled words but his brain can't process anything.  
Pull at his hair harder, the pain shooting like sparks on his scalp he sobs. He wish he didn’t feel this way he wish he was a good person, he fucking wish he didn't find most of his bandmates attractive. Crying harder with even harder breathing he feels a firm and solid hand on his shoulder.  
Not opening his eyes. He unfurls and collapses into their chest sobbing. Another pair of hands slowly ease his own hands out of his hair and squeeze them softly. Their soft thumb rubbing against his skin. Arms wrap around his waist but not constricting him into his body. He gasps trying to breath since his nose is clogged with snot. Whimpering he leans more into the body.  
He opens his eyes and stares down at his hands, which are still behind held, from the semi awkward angle of the pinky he could tell it was Gerard. Flushing with embarrassment he swipes his hands back and curls into a ball hiding.  
“Frank it's okay, you don’t have to hide at all, you’re okay” He hears Ray and from his voice right over his shoulder. Meaning the person who is holding him is Ray. Whimpering he hides more. Ray’s hand rubbing against his back comfortingly. Rubbing his eyes once again he unfurls and stares at the ground.  
In a weak broken voice that he hates, he says “i-i’m sorry”. Playing with his black painted chipped nails. Trying not to look up at their most likely annoyed faces.  
“Frankie, why are you saying sorry at all?” Gerard says softly reaching out and holding his hands again. The older Way’s hands were soft, a little dry in some areas. But like him, Ray or Mikey he didn’t play a stringed instrument that gave his callouses. He concentrates on the feeling of Gee’s hands while he tries to pull himself together enough to speak.  
Looking up, he sees an extremely worried Gerard staring at him a little expectantly waiting for him to respond. He looks over and Mikey is also watching him, his eyes soft with a look of knowing what he just went through, a small frown on his face.  
“I got overwhelmed and just sorta broke down, I don’t know what happened at all” His eyes move back to Gerard, he has a look of understanding written all over his face. The older Way’s thumb continued once again to rub against his skin.  
“Have you been getting enough sleep?” Gerard says and Frank gives a bitter laugh.  
“No one in this bus is getting enough sleep Gee, I mean I've tried my best to rest but y'know, hyperactive mind” He says and he feels Rays fingers tracing circles into his skin under his shirt and hoodie where no one can see. Blushing softly as he sighs. “Can we get back on the road? I-i'm sorry that I worried everyone, just a build up of emotions and shit and I haven’t been able to release em and shit. I think i'm fine now tho” he murmurs and looks at his and Gee’s intertwined hands.  
Gerard hums and Mikey gives a noise of agreement. He feels what he presumes to be Bob’s hand ruffling his hair. The drummer gives off a simple ‘we got you dude’ and then sits back down. Gee gives his hands a squeeze before letting go of them. Shutting the sliding door and walking back to the driver's seat.  
Frank looks at Ray confused who was still holding him softly. Rubbing his hip with one hand and the other Ray maneuvers Frank back into his seat and tucks him in. Ray lets go of the shorter man's waist then buckles himself in the middle seat.  
“I'm gonna sit here with you and keep an eye on you” Ray says in a soft comforting tone, “if you need anything just double tap me and I’ll help to the best I can.” Ray smiles at him with such warmth a love Frank has to stop himself from leaning up and kissing the man. He didn’t want an explanation from Frank on what happened he just accepted it and is just there. He gives a small smile. Leans into the warm comfort that is Ray and closes his eyes nearly happily.  
The thick lead guitarist's arm wraps around his waist again. Rubbing at his sensitive hip. And with his other hand, pulls the thin gray blanket over them. Frank feels content and a little flustered but good. Occasionally having to stop himself from squirming or leaning more into Toro’s hand.

\--

He didn’t really sleep and didn’t leave his body. Thankfully he just existed. Ray and the blanket kept him warm. Ray's hand kept on his hip comfortably like it had been there thousands of times. Though his cock did take a little interest in the circles that were sometimes drawn into the thin skin there it mainly kept itself under control. They had to stop once to stretch their legs and use the bathroom before Mikey took the wheel.  
Gerard had told them they would be at the venue soon, it was starting to get darker outside, the sun going down the air once again cooling. He looked out the window as they drove through the fields. Lights in the distance promising a city soon, full of life and energy.  
As he watches he feels Ray's other arm wrap around his middle. Grumbling something sleepily, nuzzling into his neck/shoulder area. He can feel his skin heating up. But he doesn’t say anything, he’s pretty sure the man is asleep or at least half asleep. He squirms a little in his seat. Ray’s hand was so fucking close to his crotch and the warmth was travelling up to that area. He practically in his head begged his cock to stay put and not do anything. But like him, it was stubborn as hell.  
He felt his pants get a little tighter, but Ray’s hand doesn’t move. It is about a inch or two away from his crotch and he can feel the warmth of his face. Thankfully the blanket and the dull light made sure no one could see the problem in his pants. He squirms and whimpers needily under his breath. Ray making a ‘hm?’ noise.  
The curly men's hair falls over his face and tickles Frank's skin. I squirms closer to Ray loving the touch and warmth of everything. It was so confusing, he was needy for more, to be touched more yet he wanted to hide. He feels Ray’s full lips press against his lower neck before he nuzzles it again. He can’t tell if he is awake or not anymore. But the kiss sends a twitch to his dick, a pool of aching fills his lower stomach. God he needed to get out of the van soon before he did something stupid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a whirl wind of emotions I know. When I was writing this I was emotional, upset and on the brink of just full on sobbing. I needed to get my emotions out so, well we have this chapter.


	5. Frank's Dick nearly breaks off due to how many times he gets hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank iero himself is one horny mother fucker. His bandmates just love to tease him and make him nearly become a cat in heat. He does, finally get some alone time after Gerard takes his evil knowledge into his own hands and touches Frank's ass on stage.

He couldn’t stop himself. He pressed more into the thicker man holding him. Whimpering and keening softly like an in heat cat. Face flushed and leaned his head into the chilled window. Trying to hide his face and cool it down. Hi pants were uncomfortable and too tight, he really wanted to fix them for the 1000th time this day. He couldn't tell Ray was on the edge of sleep and he was way too scared to move even an inch down there.  
He wanted to cry again. Out of frustration and pure need. He could practically imagine him on his knees in front of Ray, tears of frustration slipping down his face. Pawing at Ray’s thick thighs and begging him to do anything to Frank. Anything to just make him orgasm and make him finally release all of the pent up energy. Ray just petting his hair and smirking at him. Watching him plead.  
Shivering as he forces himself to stop imagining the thing he wishes so much to happen. Face warm and heavy. He turns to Ray and hides in his body. Hiding his whimpers. Ray holding him speaks, a just wake gravelly voice.  
“What’s wrong Frankie?” The older one brings him closer into his chest. Hiding his erection the best he could, still whimpering. “Frankie?” Ray says again into his hair softly. Frank the best he could, moves closer softly, pretending to be asleep. Pressing himself on the others knee. His cock leaking in his pants from just pure fucking horny energy. The pressure from Ray’s knee was the best he could for right now. Sighing happily he melts into the olders arms.  
He heard Ray stutter out his name and say oh fuck before bringing him closer. He felt Ray’s face smush into his hair and nuzzle it a little. He couldn’t at all understand what Ray is doing but he just allows it and keeps the acting up. Breathing deeply into his chest, enjoying the comforting smell. His body feels heavy as he melts more into the thicker man. He feels Ray’s arms wrap around him properly.   
Whimpering softly he hears Ray speak softly into his hair. He couldn’t hear what Ray was saying. Feeling the van jerk under them he pretends to shake awake due to it. Sitting up rubbing at his eyes, getting the sleep ickies and looking around. Ray’s arms still around his waist, he looks at the man. From the half light from the city lights and the dull yellow lights in the van he studies Ray. The thicker man’s face is flushed a little red and his eyes are hazy with something he would akin to lust.  
“Hm? What's happening?” He murmurs out like he just woke up. Stretching a little he just hears Ray sighs out.  
“You move so much in your sleep dude, god, like a little worm” Ray says a little flatly, he can’t read his tone but least he could tell that Ray believed his act.   
“You can't stop me and my squirmy wormy-ness” He shoots right back and turns to face the Way’s in the front seats.  
Gerard was looking at the road, being stuck a little bit in traffic getting to the venue. Looking up into the rearview mirror he catches the younger Way’s eyes. He looks at him and then raises his eyebrow. Mikey’s eyes stare directly into his soul. Somehow he feels like Mikey knew everything and more that he had done. Mikey felt like a cryptid to him. Constantly knowing eyes, a stone cold face that tells no one anything and a body that seemed to teleport sometimes. Looking away from his piercing gaze he moves off of Ray’s knee and wraps the blanket around him. Now cold since the hornieness was leaving his body.  
Huffing softly as they drive up to the venue. Frank curses his homoeroticness and how horny he was.  
\--  
Frank was fucking jamming the fuck out on stage. Playing Hang Em’ High. He was out of breath, body sweaty and he played his heart out. Flipping his head back, his hair finally getting out of his face. Looking towards the black ceiling and bright stage lights he pants. Hearing someone walk up to his side. Tuning his ear softly he takes it in as Gerard. He moves up next to him on the semi small stage, screaming into the mic he leans a little against him. His right hand goes to his waist. God fucking dammit of course he was gonna do this now. Keeping his eyes on the ceiling, he feels Gerard’s hand goes to his ass. He feels the slight touch of something before he feels the singer's hand. Just grab a handful of his ass.  
From the position of his face no one can see his eyes, well he hopes at least. A small stutter in his playing, a harsh sucking in of breath. He wanted to squirm, wanted to press so badly into Gee’s hand. He wanted to whimper and moan. The moment ends and Gee moves his hand away. Frank Moves his head down and glares at him. But Gerard was already walking away towards the beginning of the stage again. Frank totally wanna gonna catch a single bathroom and jerk off. He felt like his dick was gonna break off from getting hard so many times in the day.  
\--  
He pushed into the bathroom. Body light yet heavy. His feet slow and stutter but his breath quickly. Locking the door behind himself. Pressing against the wall he quickly starts unbuckling his belt and unzipping his jeans. Pulling out his hard cock, sighing happily. Finally being able to touch himself after several days.   
Loosely grabbing the head of his cock he rubs circles into the slit of his head. Moaning happily into the quiet bathroom, hips rolling a little. His cock was practically begging for more, not just a simple jerk off session in a venue bathroom. Groaning he starts pumping his cock as his mind goes haywire with the adrenaline of the show still pumping through his veins. He tries not to look around the most likely dirty bathroom.  
Huffing, he starts letting his mind do what it wants. He’s sitting on a bed, he’s nearly naked but he has a jock strap on, he wouldn’t normally wear that but he felt, almost like it fit the best. His gaze travels up his own body as he sees where his head is. He could feel his real actual body in the bathroom heat up as he sees what is happening.  
His face is shoved in some dark haired pubes, their leaking pre cock laying against his face. Suddenly he is in his body instead of the 3rd person view. He feels their hard warm cock on his face. He whimpers and nuzzles it a little before laying a kiss on it. The person’s cock was beautiful. Medium size (though it could probably wreak all of his holes), They seemed to be around six inches, a little more than normal thick and with a little freckle just before the head of the cock. He practically melted, leaning into the crotch of the man. Taking a deep breath before kissing all over the underside of the cock.  
Trying to look up at the man who had the cock but he couldn’t really. Groaning in frustration he takes it into his mouth suckling on the head before bobbing his head up and down needily. Loving the salty taste.  
Squirming out of his daydream he pants heavily as he cums hard all over his hand and the toilet paper he, sometimes while he was daydreaming had gotten. Eyes rolling slightly at the thought of his face covered in cum from the unknown man in his daydream. Leaning against the wall he continues to take deep breaths of cold air. The feeling of some of his pent up energy escaping out of his feet back to the Earth.  
Cleaning himself up, getting all situated he then proceeds to wash his hands like a good boy. Smiling to himself at the minor self praise. He dries his hands and then walks out of the bathroom.  
“Why the fuck were you in there so long shortass” Fuck was all Frank could think as he stared at his bandmate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're gay, i'm gay. Who the fuck is manning the Hornie boat????


	6. Motel with one bed, what a good trope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank write more in his diary and rethinks over a little of what has happened. Also yearning for more homoeroticness with his Bandmate Mr. My Chemical Romance. Frank also chats with Gerard while in a decent motel.

Shifting on his feet he stares at Bob’s face. His hands pulling on his tie a little. He could feel the heat on his face of embarrassment and his wide eyes. Bob walks up to him and looks at him worriedly. Looking over his face.   
Walking up to Frank, Bob puts his hand on his right shoulder. Bob’s eyes looking over every part of his facial features and posture. He felt like he could feel how Bob was judging him. Maybe smelling the sex on his body, but maybe it would be masked by the sweat of the show. Maybe he could see his blown pupils and how a little out of breath he still was. He squirmed in his shoes, uncomfortable.  
“D-Did you have another panic attack dude? Gerard explained to us while you slept.” Bob continued to ramble on, looking worried. Frank’s shoulders fell and let his head collapse. He nods a little. Bob grew silent. “It’s okay dude, you can come to us and we’ll help you.” He said, pulling him into a hug.   
He stood there in Bob’s arms. This was weird, weird with that someone like him. Who didn’t talk a shit ton, would care about him. He feels out of control of his body, he hugs Bob back. Whimpering a little, feeling tears drip down his face once again today. He felt Bob’s hand awkwardly rub his back, like he wasn’t expecting this. It makes sense. Bob grew up in a household where they didn’t speak on their emotions much, but they did stand up for others, well what he and the others got from him when he was drunk. Bob didn’t talk a bunch about his childhood.  
“Let's get back to the boys, they’ll be missing us” Moving out of the hug he wipes his tears and Bob pats his shoulder. Bob helps him move back to the changing room, glad he got out of that awkward situation by crying.  
They walk back into the changing room, Mikey laid out on the floor on his back, Gerard with a towel in his hand whipping off his makeup and Ray on the couch staring at his hands. When they walk in he gives a nod to Bob and pops over to Mikey. Standing over him he stares down at him, his shadow over his face. Mikey’s eyes finding his. Eyes cold and nearly unfeeling.  
Smirking at him like an evil little munchkin, quickly squatting down, he snatches Mikey’s glasses and runs off to the other side of the changing room. Mikey shakily gets up, cursing the whole way. Squinting, trying to make out shapes of things he needs to avoid and who was who. He walks like a zombie in the area Frank was kinda in.   
“Don’t be an asshole Frank,” Gee says. He turned his head and about 5 feet away from him was Gerard, without his makeup on now his eyes looked sharp but with a pool of warmth at the bottom. Unlike his brother Frank most of the time could read into what the singer was thinking just from his eyes.  
“I’ll do what I want, anyways, he walks like a zombie when he doesn’t have his glasses!” He snickered to himself and gave the taller a smile before he looked back to Mikey. Mikey was now stumbling more toward the wall, arms outstretched with a scowl on his face.  
“Do you always want me to make the zombie groans and growls while I'm at this Iero?” Mikey snapped, scanning the room glaring towards the sound of Frank’s voice since he couldn’t pinpoint him.  
“Sure! Why not!!” He laughed before running off to where Ray was placed on the couch. Who had in the time looked up from looking at his hands to watching what was happening. All he could hear was Mikey’s grumbling and swearing at him.  
\--

It had been a couple days. They had gone through venues, a few states and more than enough money for gas. Nothing really happened. Frank wrote more in his now diary that he bought at the seemingly long ago rest stop.   
He had been tired with some occasional points where his mind left his body. But Ray and Gerard would usually take notice of when it happened in a short time, if they weren’t busy with something else that is. It had been wonderful actually to feel seen and have someone guide you back to your body and make sure you were okay. It’s nice, but he knew it wouldn't last for too long.  
He wrote on his needy and gay excursion with Toro. He noticed more and more. Simply how beautiful the man was, his hands, the way he handled himself and his face. He wanted to kiss him, be back in his thick warm lap and to do more. So much more. He wanted both sensual and sexual. But yet he didn’t know about romance. Humming softly finishes up the page, closing his pen and putting his notebook back into his bag. Sitting back up, popping his back. Melting into the bus seat. His back finally stopped bitching from him hunching over.   
Moving his eyes from the van ceiling he looks to the front and sees Bob give him a questioning look. Probably from seeing his diary he could only assume. He cocks his head to the side and looks back at the blonde man silently. Bob just shrugs and looks back to the road. Turning up the radio louder, going over the snoring of Way brother in the background.  
Soon Ray is driving them into their motel’s parking lot. They were at the halfway point of the drive to the next venue, they made sure to stop at this motel so the driver’s wouldn’t get too tired and so they could actually have some proper beds. The ones who were all currently awake all had the same though on their minds. They hadn’t seen a proper bed in about two weeks. And they all could tell from the aching complaining of their backs and the creakiness of their bones.   
The van stops and Bob hops out of the van into the cold air of some midwestern state. The air pushed into the warm box of metal making Frank shiver. He soon closes the door and hastily makes his way to the motel reception area. Frank curls in on himself a little as Ray turns down the radio and looks in the rearview mirror.  
“You wanna tell me what happened the other day?” Ray said, a little nervous from the way he talked but trying his best to be firm.  
“What day Toro, they’re all merging into each other” He says and he brings his hoodie closer to his body. Trying to reheat himself.  
The curly hair man sighs softly, taking his response earnestly. “W-when I was with you in the middle row seat.” He said slowly.  
“Hm? Oh, I can’t remember much. I was pretty drained and passed out. If I did do anything in my sleep or say anything don’t worry about it. When I get stressed or let out a lot of emotions I sleep, walk and talk.” He said, shrugging. Playing it off the best he can, not being too happy about mentioning his constant struggles and how he reacts to emotional blow outs.  
Ray hums in response, accepting his answer. Looking to the motel as Bob walks back with three key cards in hand and a smile on his face. He comes up and the van opens up the sliding door as Ray shuts off the engine. The Way’s wake up from their sleep complaining and grumbling about the sudden cool night air.

Making it into the half assed motel room, a half asleep Gerard followed after him. He sets down his night back next to the heater. Turning it onto a comfortable temperature. He looks over as Gerard collapses onto the bed.  
“Hey, nope. Up” He says before moving swiftly over to the bed. His hands resting on his slightly squishy hips.  
“Whyyyyyyy” Moaned Gerard, a tone of sadness lingering in his voice like it hurt him to move. He just rolled his eyes at the singer.  
“I need to check the bed for leftover unwanted goodies dude.” He huffed. The other male, slides off the bed onto the floor dramatically mumbling stuff all the way. Frank pulls back the covers, rubbing his hand against them to see for any crumbs or liquids. Feeling nothing he pulls up the pillows and once again sees nothing. “You can get back in bed now” Turning and making his way back to his bag he grabs his showering supplies.  
“Fuckin, why must you check.” Gerard grumbled before flopping back into bed, now with his ratty sneakers off.  
“Motel beds are sketchy as fuck dude. I don’t trust that shit.” He stands up and heads to the bathroom. With all of his showering supplies and his change of clothes.  
“Frankie,, it’s 12:45. Why the hell are you going to shower??” The other sounds exasperated. Like he hadn’t known Frank already for a couple years and how he loved his cleanliness.  
“I'm sticky, cold and gross. And its a fresh fucking bed. I'm not gonna dirty it” He rolled his eyes once again and set out his stuff. Opening up the curtain to the shower and seeing it actually looking quite decent.  
“May I join you?~” The taller male said in a jokingly seductive tone.  
“Nope. Fuck off.” He shuts the door and strips for his shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a long chapter for you all. Hope you guys like!


	7. Nice cock man, seems a little heavy. Would you like me to hold it?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tw// Sexual content, Hand jobs, grinding, and minor ass-play  
> Fucker's have sex and consent is given. Gerard then showers.

Frank didn’t really like being dirty, or feeling dirty. Along with the smell of being dirty. But that’s mainly for himself, unless the other gets super bad. The main thing is, whenever he can get a shower. He will. Cleaning off the layers of sweat, dirt and smell off of him always relaxes him. The others sometimes are confused on how he has gotten a shower at a rest stop but he has his own ways. They mainly don’t care about their hygiene too much. Especially one Gerard way. But every couple of weeks he and Ray power hose him down for his own safety and others.  
Finishing his shower, shutting off the water. He opens up the curtain and exits the shower. Grabbing one of the white towels and drying himself down. Once he is finished he grabs the towel and makes a towel wrap. Smiling like a goof to himself as he lotions up his skin, checks in on his ears and gauges. Then starts dressing. He simply puts on a new pair of boxers, dries his hair then puts on a shirt he probably stole from Ray, since it was a little big on his form.   
He shuffles the rest of his non-wet stuff back into his shower bag and opens up the door to the bathroom. Quickly shutting off the light as he enters back into the main room, the light is off and soft noises of sleep come from the older Way. Moving silently he puts his bag next to his luggage then makes his way to the bed. Slipping in the quietest he can. The bed squeaking below him.  
Getting himself all comfortable he moves into sleep. Warm and comfortable in the bed.

-  
Looking up at the green lit alarm clock he sees it’s around 5 am. Resting his head back into the pillows he starts to feel everything around him as his mind catches up to his body. He’s warmer than normal. Shifting a little he feels the arms around his waist grow a little tighter. The deep sleep breathing of Gerard against his neck. His nose nuzzled in being kept warm by Frank’s body heat. From the way they are laying, Gerard is the bigger spoon, a protective barrier keeping him safe from the unknowingness of the room.   
He sighs happily and melts more into the olders arms. Feeling safe. The body heat of the two mixing together well and keeping both of them warm but not overheating. Even though Frank was only in boxers and a shirt he wasn’t self-conscious in the situation. A small smile splays on his face as he closes his eyes.  
-  
He awakes again, pressure and heat in his crotch, great, morning wood with your best friend cuddling you. His mind blanks for a second. Who also seemed to have morning wood. Wonderful.  
Their position hadn’t changed much. Gerard and him just curled up more. Thankfully Frank’s hard on wasn’t as noticeable as Gerard’s, which was pressed up against his ass comfortably. Like it was meant to be there. Flushing red he both hoped Gee woke up and also stayed asleep. Cause how in the fuck would he explain and get out of this situation. He squeezes his eyes closed. In his mind imaging their position, thinking of a game plan.  
Frank was currently little spooned with Gerard the big spoon. He was curled up and he could try to squirm and move slowly out of the bed due to creakiness but it might just make things worse. The leads singer’s face was tucked comfortably in the crease of his neck/collarbone area. Breathing of sleep is still happening thankfully. Gee’s left hand was resting comfortably on the small pudge of tummy, which made things more difficult for him in case his hand slipped downward when moving. His other arm was pressed up under them above both of their heads. His thoughts are soon cut off as the older stirs.  
Gerard just hums and moves a little more into the world of waking people. Frank quickly checks the clock, 8am. Frank’s neck heats up with sparks as Gerard kisses it softly before pressing himself more into Frank. His cock making more of an apparentness against his sensitive ass.  
“Goodmornin” Gee says and grind up into him. Almost like he doesn’t fully comprehend the situation yet, like he was still half asleep. Thinking hard he tries really hard to rationalize the situation. He and Gerard had done lots of stuff on stage but this was different. This wasn’t them putting on a show to make homophobes mad, this was in private. There was the situation several days ago where Gerard played with his ass but that could be explained, right? His mind moves faster and faster. Could all of this shit they have done might of just been and excuse for Gerard to be, really fucking gay with Frank? Did those kisses on stage mean more, were those touches and seconds where they held spaces of pure sexuality more than just infuriating others. His face flushed along with his cock.  
“Frankie, i-is this okay?” Gerard’s hand he now feels, has moved from his stomach to hovering just over his cock. Frank smiled a little to himself. Still tense with anxiety and possible world shattering realization, Gee had asked for his consent before doing. Which he really fucking appreciated.  
“Y-yeah” he stuttered out softly into the now cold room, the heater having probably kicked off in the middle of the night. His nose nipping with chilliness. Gerard smiles into his shoulder. His once before hovering hands slowly rests onto his underwear covered cock. Thumb slowly rubbing up and down the side. Little sparks and shivers lighting up the skin. He sighs happily at the feeling, loving the attention from another person. The older grinds more into him, pleasure on both his front and back. Muddling up his brain.  
Soon Frank’s cock is comfortably in Gee’s hand. He’s pumping slowly. Occasionally the palm of his soft hand going over the top of Frank’s cock head easily. The right amount of pleasure, almost lovingly. Speeding up a little as Gerard gets needier himself, loving the feeling of holding Frank in his hand he growls a little in his ear. Turning on Frank even more. He whimpers back and opens up his neck almost instinctively. Dry lipped kisses are pressed into his sensitive skin. The singer's hard cock moving more against his ass making him squirm with need. Pleasure like a tidal wave splashes over Frank’s mind, pure need in control now.   
“Please, god gee, more” Whining like he was about to break. Begging for more. The hand around his dick instead of loose grips completely and starts pumping him like he does in his alone time. Eyes rolling back at the feeling he moans into the dense cold air. His legs spasming and moving against his control. The panting against his neck gets heavier, arousal filling both of their bodies like fire. Heat pools at the base of his dick as he gets closer the more Gerard goes on.  
A little while later Frank is spilling all over the other hand. Moaning and whimpering loudly as he releases. His shoulders slouching down happily. Before he can even react. Gerard grabs his hips with his hands and grinds needily into the shorter. Panting and groaning into Frank’s ear. The overstimulation of his ass cheeks nearly being used like a fuck toy and the orgasm leave Frank whimpering louder and grinding into his partner. Gee’s moans break as he cums hard in his underwear. Collapsing into the bed. Tension leaking out of both of them.  
“H-holy fuck man” Gee speaks finally after a couple seconds. Rolling onto his back and looking at the ceiling. He soon does the same and looks over at the dude who just grinded against his ass until he came. He also realized that he mainly got close from jerking off Frank. Fuck. He sees the hand he came all over Gerard was licking up, enjoying the taste from what he could tell. All he could do was blush probably to the point of looking like a fire truck and gulp hard.

Soon both him and Gee had to get up and ready for cheap motel breakfast and leave for the road. He first went to the bathroom, cleaning himself and using the toilet. Also grabbing his now dried showering supplies from the shower. Coming back out of the bathroom he leans over and puts them in his bag.   
“Frankie”  
“Hm? Yes?”  
“Was what we did okay? I-I didn’t want to do anything without your okay and like, I wanted to know if it was okay” Gerard rambled out, obviously being in his head and overthinking things. Which he often did with his depression.  
“It’s okay Gee, I liked it, don’t worry” He speaks and straightens back up. Looking over to Gerard who was picking at his cuticles. He watches as he sighs with relief, giving him a doe eyed relieved look a small smile and heads in the bathroom.  
Gerard then proceeded to shower. Which both shocked and made sense to Frank. Which was bewildering to say the least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so like. I had a little bit of trouble writing this chapter and the smut due to the fact of trying to not make it confusing. I just hope it's readable to you guys. Also Frank gets cuddled, which I imagine he would just melt into your arms if you did. Reminder; consent is fucking important and in each smut section there will be consent given by both parties unless there is CNC play. Always ask for consent and anything other than a 'yes, yeah, yep or go ahead' is not consent and you need to ask on why and make sure the other party is okay. Don't push for consent.

**Author's Note:**

> Just to remind everyone, I have dyslexia so there will be mistakes and i'm sorry about that. I try my best with help to make sure everything is readable and good for y'all :)


End file.
